"It's over.  So that was it, we're done now.  Five years, now done.  Five 
years, in the past.  The last page read and the cover closed.  The final line 
spoken and the curtain drawn."  
  She was sad.
  She felt glad to be free again.  It wasn't that it had been bad, it just 
hadn't been right and towards the end it had just gotten stifling.  The past 
year hadn't gone anywhere and she felt no closer to meeting her goals than 
when they had gotten together.  It was too long to be static without hope.  
Too long to be alone in a relationship.
  They say you're supposed to forgive and forget.  There really wasn't anything 
to forgive for and the forgetting was hard to overcome with constant contact.  
Dinner up in the woods at a friend's house was a perfect break.  It would be 
a place where the isolation would be comfortable and welcome.
  His palce was modest yet warm and inviting.  He had a fire going when she 
showed up since she usually requested one when visiting in the past.  This 
time was nice since for the first time she didn't have to worry about someone 
else.  This was what she missed, the freedom to have a life.  The freedom to 
act as she pleased with whomever she pleased whenever she wanted.  Why couldn't 
she be allowed to have this without having to compromise her other needs?  
  "Why can't the world just let me be who I want without having to shove me 
into their boxes?"  
  But this was good; the fireplace, the woods, the wine, and the company.  He 
had always spoken of those perfect moments and this seemed to fit the bill, 
except he was god-knows-where and she was somewhere that wouldn't have been 
appreciated 4 weeks ago.
  "Cheers, to freedom and friends"
  "Cheers"
  The conversation all night had been everything from enlightening to 
amusing to enthrawling.  The connections didn't seem to stop, on everything 
from social outlook to international cuisine.  He had led an adventurous 
life, with constant stories to tell and philosophies to share.  His travels 
through Europe, hitchhiking across Austrailia, always with colorful people 
and rich in culture.  They talked on literature long into the night as this 
was one of her passions that he shared.  As they talked they poured more 
bottles of wine, another shared passion.  
  They lounged on overstuffed pillows, curled up next to the fire.  The 
heat of the fire and the wine warmed their bodies and hearts respectively.  
Their hands casually intertwined as they gazed into and beyond the flickering 
light of the fireplace.  Absently, she turned her kissed him on the cheek 
then paused.  Instantly, their hearts beating heavily, he leaned forward and 
kissed her gently on the lips.  It was the first time she had kissed someone 
else in a while.  There was a distinct lack of facial hair.  He was a bit 
more passive in his kissing and not as sloppy.  It felt so wonderful to be 
kissing this new person who kissed this new way in this new place.  She felt 
swept up and free.  She was empowered and living her own life for herself, 
not trying to stay within someone else's expecations.  Expectation and hope 
are the death of contentment she had heard once.  She was content here and 
now, her face smiling up at him leaning over her.
  They fumbled slowly with each others clothes, halfway tangled in limbs, 
pillows and limbs.  The fire seemed to grow warmer as the last button of 
her shirt parted ways with it's hole to reveal her smooth belly.  His 
caresses gave her goosebumps on her arms.  Any other time they would have 
felt like cold hands but tonight everything felt like it was on fire.  They 
kissed with more urgency, pausing only to pull his shirt over his head in 
an act of tit-for-tat.  The confines of her bra being removed shortly after 
revealed her more than amble breasts and the orange glow from the fireplace 
made them look even more perfect than he had imagined they'd be.  
  The urgency of their kissing became more pronounced as the remaining 
clothing slid down to the ankles to be lost into the makeshift bedding.  She 
was already quite damp and moved unconsiously under his touch, her hips 
rocking gently and instinctively biting his lip.  Her nipples, not usually 
sensative, strained as if to trying to escape from her breasts to meet his 
tounge.  Electricity shot down through her womb forcing her to pull him on 
top, needing more than his soft idle caressing.  She was alive again.  She 
felt him inside, she felt herself wrapped around him and him in turn wrapped 
around her.  It was a foriegn feeling wrapping her arms around a different 
sized body, feeling a different shape inside her.  It was a new shape though, 
and a new body and this was something new she was doing and she was doing it 
all for herself because she could.  The heat was overwhelming.  The heat from 
the fire, and from above.  The heat from the inside and the out.  The heat 
from the hot breath in her ear and the flesh under her fingernails.  She felt 
it build deep within her as she thrust herself upwards with a matching rythym, 
pulling him closer to her.  Her muscles clenched his against his thrusting, 
nails deep into his shoulder and side.  Everything in the world seemed so 
distant for just that instant and then it came rushing back.  His pace 
quickened in unison with his rough breathing next to her face.  The longer 
faster strokes brought her oversensative clitoris almost to the point of pain 
without leaving the world of extasy.  Her suddenly lurched forward, five, 
maybe seven times slowing to a gentle motion like a sprinter cooling down 
after a race. 
  He kissed her on the neck and then on the lips.  There was that new kiss 
again.  Here was this new person and this new experience.  Reluctantly, he 
got up and wandered down the hall to the bathroom.  
  "Could you get me a glass of water?"
  "Sure"
  She layed by the fire fighing off the impending drowsiness, contemplating 
her new found life and freedom.  She curled up and cried: it was still over.

--------------
12/10/02 2:30am:  it's 2:30am and I still love you.